Me and My Peers/arguing with parents...

     Okay so up until now I”ve only told you a few things that aggravate me.  Well what you probably don’t know is I am the one who frustrates me the most.  I seriously hate how much of a narcissist I am.  It frustrates me to no end, but I can’t help it.  I am frustrated by myself, but I love myself.  But after since I’ve been thinking about it, maybe that’s the key to being a fully developed human being.  Is to love yourself while identifying your faults and trying to turn them into strengths or at least accept them.  With that being said you also can’t only focus on one of these to be healthy.  If you only focus on how awesome you are then your going to be that idiot that everyone hates, but at the same time if you only focus on your faults then your going to be that downer that no one wants to be around.  Now for the rough part.  Once you identify your faults that’s great but you need to understand that the fact that your messed up is not in any way your parents fault, because lets face it your parents are completely messed up in the head as well.  They had more than enough to deal with while raising you, and for most of you they did a pretty good job, some of you are total jerks but that’s okay you can work on that.  But they did do a good job for the most part and I can guarantee that you always had a roof over your head and never went hungry but there were times that they did just to make sure that you didn’t.  So before you complain about your parents or something they did that was a little messed up here’s what you need to do, look at everything they did for you and see if your little problem even begins to stack up against what they did.  By the way the picture above looks exactly like what me and my dad looked like arguing when i was younger just saying...

Ed Hardy Memorabilia...

    Look at these two idiots... How does anyone think that that can make you look cool?  Out of all the trends and fashion fads that I don’t understand this is the worst of all of them.  Why would you want to wear a piece of clothing that has crappy tattoo art all over it? Do you people not understand how disgusting that is?! How do you not just need to take a shower or at least wash your hands while wearing that out of pure disgust?! I saw this dude wearing one that just had the Ed Hardy logo on the front and I was like “Okay that’s not too inappropriate.  He still looks like a complete idiot but at least its not disgusting looking”… Or so I thought, because then I looked at his arms and was like “What is all over this dudes arms?”  When I got closer I saw that it was one of those t-shirts that is made too look like a long sleeve shirt under a short sleeve shirt, which is bad enough already, but the long sleeves were covered in fake tattoos!  Now doesn’t that just make you sick!? And let me make this clear it was like gross tattoo here gross tattoo there,  No, it was COVERED in fake tattoos.  In fact some of the tattoo’s were overlapping the other ones,  and that’s already freaking disgusting but the cuffs of the sleeves are just normal looking so you can’t even say that its meant to look like there real tattoos because it’s a blatantly obvious gross pale skin color.  So the next time that you are thinking about wearing this crap just save yourself some embarrassment and me some frustration and just pick something else.
        -Sean Johnston

Senior Year

    So I’m not complaining that I’m almost done with school believe me I am more than okay with that its just this year is by far the most stressful year of my life.  I have teachers coming down hard on me because they think they’re saving me from senioritis.  So they assign me a bunch of pointless stuff in an attempt to force me to do work so I’ll pass all of my Senior year.  Plus I have a terrible case of senioritis so all this work they assign doesn’t help me it just makes it way worse.  I thought I loved someone but it turned out to be a false alarm.  But the worst predicament causing item on my list of crap causing stressors is by far Parents.  They claim to only want to help us and do what’s best for us.  And I’m sure that they do want us to become responsible people like they claim but then whenever a chance for us to take responsibility comes up they force us to let them take charge.  We are at the point of our lives where it is time for us to step up or step aside and they want to force us to step aside.  So we can still be there children because when they look at us they still see their baby boy or their baby girl, when we took our first steps, or when we fell messing around.  However to all Parents,  you have to let us cowboy up and take responsibility for our own actions and decisions,  but to all of my friends or people reading this who agree with me its also your job to accept the consequences of your actions both good and bad.  I promise you we’ll all be fine…
        -Sean Johnston

To all Hackers, You need a girlfriend…

    What in Gods name would posses you to attack some random person’s website? I don’t know you and you don’t know me and yet I hate you more than anything in the world because you made me spend 32 hours going through thousands of lines of codes to undo all of the crap that you did.  Why would you intentionally frustrate me like that you moron?  Were you bored? Do you not see how insufferably idiotic that is?! Who sits on their couch and say’s “you know what? I’m pretty bored… Oh! I know I’ll go commit a federal offence!”  Because yes it is a federal offense and you will go to federal prison with a big new friend named Bubba.  So instead of trying to hack my website, with nothing more than the “firebug” add-on for Firefox (which by the way is the biggest rookie mistake ever) and messing with the code on someone’s website, how about you go outside.  How about you go talk to a girl?  And before you say “but dude I totally already talk to girls all the time!”  Ask yourself a question was there a computer between you and this “girl”?  Because if so that’s not what I’m talking about and that probably wasn’t a girl.  Oh and the final reason you don’t want to hack a random persons website is you don’t know who they are or what their capable of…

        -Sean Johnston

People Jingling change…

    So there is nothing on this planet that I hate more than people who jingle change in their pocket.  There’s no foreseeable reason for them to exist on this planet other than the sole purpose to annoy the rest of us into tar and feathering them.  I hate standing in line at the bank and having some jerk in front of me do nothing but use his pocket change to let me and the rest of the bank know that he’s bored,  or when I’m in class and some idiots not paying attention and is rolling his loose change around in his pocket because god knows that if he can’t pay attention then the rest of us shouldn’t be able too.  I hate to say it but I hate these people because to me its just selfish and rude to do it.  It’s like your saying that your boredom is more important than my sanity.  I personally believe there should be an alternate universe that we can shove all of these annoying people into so that they can all just annoy each other or just talk about change jingling.  Now I’m not saying this should be a bad place mind you, quite the opposite for them for us it would be a terrible place but for them it would be awesome.  I think that in there universe Inflation should run wild so that money doesn’t have any value so there would be big piles of change scattered about so that they can jingle it to their little hearts content.  In fact they can even roll around in the huge piles of money, they can do whatever they want with it as long as they aren’t in this universe annoying the hell out of the rest of us.  Of course the massive Inflation would make life suck for everyone else in that universe but they wouldn’t care because their change jinglers.  Their selfish and don’t care about anyone else other than themselves.  Their in the same category of selfishness as that girl from willy wonka, William Shatner, Teenagers, and Tom Cruise.  Which means that their not as bad as Mel Gibson, Michael Moore, AIG, Enron, and Donald Trump, but their still pretty bad… Im just saying

        -Sean Johnston

We all need alone time...

I swear people refuse to leave me alone.  It’s getting to be a little bit ridiculous.  Now don’t get me wrong I do like people.  I enjoy peoples company, just not all the time.  There are times that all I want to do is watch a John Wayne, or Steve McQueen movie.  You know just get entranced in another world of Cowboys and Indians, or a Nazi German Prisoner of war camp escape attempt.  However unfortunately I cant do that.  People keep asking me questions.  Telling me how I should live, asking me how my life’s going telling me how their life’s going, asking about my facebook status or whatever and by the way who cares about facebook status’?  I mean honestly who gives a tiny rats keister (by the way did you know that “keister” originally meant a persons suitcase?), personally I believe that facebook only exists to be a giant hateful soul crushing tool to be used by my parents.  If you don’t believe me here’s a little story.  I was sitting in my room watching the movie “Bullit” which is a phenomenal movie starring Steve McQueen, and it pretty much defines cool, and my mom calls my over the phone to yell at me about something my dad put on facebook.  Well upon further investigation into what the heck she was talking about I found that my mom wrote on my facebook wall yelling at me about not walking the dogs when I stopped by the house for five minutes.  Well my father in his infinite wisdom decided to post a comment to her comment saying nothing more than “68” that’s it just the number “68”.  Now to a normal person that seems random, unless your me.  You see my dad has a phone that does countdowns until a certain day of the year.  Well for past 297 days my dad has told me on a daily basis a different number starting with 365 all the way down to at the time “68”.  Well for those of you who havent figured out what these numbers mean… it’s how many days I have left until I’m eighteen years old and can make my own decisions.  Well that’s what it means to me to him its his last child support payment.  Anyway so he posts the number 68 and she’s already mad, so when I originally saw that he had posted that I just figured “oh well mothers not very good at math anyway.  She’ll just think that dads going insane.”  Well unfortunately for me moms not very good at math but her stupid boyfriend who does nothing but infuriate me is quite adequate at basic math and did his calculations to help my mom figure out what it meant and then my movie night turned into a typical Johnston family night which is an argument between the two houses through me.  So instead of letting this become that crappy night I put both of my parents on phone with each other turned on the speaker phone and said “Listen children! I am not a part of your petty squabbling! Now you two either play nice or kill each other I really have no preference as too which happens! Now I’m going to go watch my movie! So you two… fight to the death!”  and I ran to my room and barricaded my door with my dresser, and watched my movie.  Yeah that’s how you handle that situation.  Anyway now people I’m not saying don’t talk to me I quite enjoy talking to all of you.  However if it seems like I don’t want to talk to you… keep talking to me because as you all know I have no problem saying exactly what I am thinking no matter who I’m talking to or what kind of state of mind they are.  So up until this point in time I have stayed pretty much on one topic the whole time so now I’m give y'all a list of things that frustrate to the point that it makes me want to squeeze lemons into paper cuts on my eyes that were given to me by a large sweaty communist.  Ahem…. Communists, Fake Gangsters, People who say that everyone in my generation are idiots,  people who say that people are wearing their pants around their ankles (It doesn’t make any sense to say that because if their pants were around their ankles they wouldn’t be able to walk), people in trailer parks, people who live in tornado alley and then get upset that their house got thrown fifty feet by twister or hurricane, Small children due to the fact that their sticky,  Vegetarians, Pacifists, Old people, People who think that the Dukes of Hazard was a racist show, Emo kids, Substitute school teachers for the simple fact that no matter how nice I am to them they always yell at me (personally I think they all get together in the most evil place imaginable, maybe Fashion Bug, and all look at a giant picture of me and they all go “LETS GET HIM!”), Bleeding-heart liberals, Liberals, Joe Biden, Democrats, Hippies, people who ride mopeds, people who ride mopeds and wear leather jackets with big Harley Davidson logos on their back, People who cut in front of me at walmart, people who are my cashier at walmart, people who believe they can cast spells, People wearing sandals and socks, Dudes wearing pinky rings, slim-Jims, People who eat Slim-Jims, People who tell me I need Jesus, When my grandma threw a bible at me and told me I need Jesus, Romance Novels, Anyone who reads romance novels, Anyone who hates the movie Braveheart, Anyone who hates John Wayne movies, Anyone who hates Steve McQueen movies, and finally every single one of you little punks who insist on telling me that life is short… It really isn’t! I’m ninety nine percent positive that it lasts up too 115 years and 252 days (based on the life of Christian Mortensen.  Don’t believe me look it up punks!)  Anyway I know I got really off topic at the end but theirs my rant.

Hate to tell you but yes you are mainstream…

    Hipsters! Who doesn’t hate hipsters? They all smell funny and look ridiculous.  Their hair is so greasy it stands up by itself.  I hate these people so much.  And its not just because of who you are I would be perfectly fine with y’all wanting to not be mainstream.  But when you get all snobby because we’re not listening to the kind of music you want to listen to, it just frustrates me. 

This is A list to test if you are hipster…
You grow ironic facial hair
2. You have more plaid shirts than tshirts
3. You refuse to admit that you listen to anything that anyone else has ever heard of
4. You no longer love First Ave. since it got "all mainstream" (but really you were kicked out)
5. thrift store/boutique owners know you by name
6. You're so over the Current
7. You wear a scarf when it is 85 degrees outside
8. you loathe Top 40... unless it's being mixed by Girl Talk, obviously
9. if the cover is more than $0, then the band obviously sucks
10. you won't tell anyone where you get your hair cut because you're a) afraid they'll copy it, and 2) embarassed by how much you pay for it
If three or more of these apply to you get off this blog right now! You don’t belong here and how are you reading this aren’t computers too mainstream for y’all?

Now if you’re still here you can This is my recollection of the events that happened a week ago…  I’m sitting in south side coffee shop listening to some George Strait songs.  Some random dudes sit down at the table I’m at and ask what I’m listening to.  I told them I was listening to some George Strait.  They looked at me like I was selling nuclear secrets to North Korea… “What?! Don‘t you know that he‘s like totally mainstream man?” they ask me.  “Umm I don’t really care dude I like his music dude…”  Dude you should totally listen to this band called Fancy Space People.” So while they were lecturing me about the right kind of music I brought these two webpages up on my iPad, http://www.wikihow.com/Be-a-Hipster, http://www.ranker.com/list/bands-that-will-get-you-into-a-hipster_s-pants/.  Basically two different websites explaining how to be a hipster and I explained to them that they fact that these websites existed meant that being a hipster was in fact mainstream and therefore their entire lives were basically void since they spent the whole time trying to not be mainstream and ended up mainstream.  To which they got mad stood up with their ridiculous espresso cups and stormed off to another table.  Oh yeah that’s a win for me! Suck it hipsters!

People acting like something their not...

    Okay so this is something that particularly aggravates me.  It’s like your saying that who you are is not good enough and basically your making yourself look ridiculous in the process.  Now this goes for everyone and I’m not just talking about people acting like a particular race of people.  I’m talking about people acting like what we know their not.  If you’ve never rode a horse or work on a ranch then you’re not a cowboy.  If you’ve never worked at a blue collar job stop acting like your on the blue collar comedy tour.  I swear to god all of you are the worst people I have ever met and make me want to hurt you in the worst way possible.  This is starting to get out of hand.  Why can’t we all just be what we are and not worry about what everyone else is and just be who we are?  Could you imagine that?  A world where people don’t go crazy over status symbols?  Because status symbols are getting ridiculous.  It used to be that really the only status symbol was where you lived, but that’s a pretty stupid way to show everyone your status in life because if you live in the rich part of town the only people who will know that you live there are your neighbors and their in the same neighborhood as you so are therefore the same status so there’s not really any reason to brag.  That’s kind of like going to someone else who has a really nice car, I don’t know lets say a Porsche, and bragging to them that you have a Porsche and acting like they should be envious of you.  And even so we shouldn’t be bragging about things we have that we want other people to be envious of, because I mean honestly Who cares? I know that for some reason you people think that its an important part of life to show off all your cool stuff to everyone and make them wish that they were you but seriously stop it, it’s not cool, its not hip, its not awesome, it’s stupid of you to act like that.  And now people are trying to loop me into that group because I carry my iPad around with me.  I carry it around with me because its handy and has my movies on it not because I want you people to “wish you were me”.  It’s just handy to have.  Now the rest of you stop getting wrapped up in status symbols or I will come after you…

            -Sean Johnston

Why people should shut up about congressional Salaries

       Everyone let me ask you a question does a doctor make more than you? yes why because they have a more difficult job.  Do you wish to make the same amount of money as a fast food worker? no? why? because you have a more important job than them.  Now why in the name of all that is holy would you want someone who makes the legislation that governs your life to make an "average salary"? now i understand that it would "make them want to create legislation that helps you" but think about it that makes you no better than the big corporations you just want them to make legislation that benefits you instead of the corporations but that's still wrong, and I'm sorry if your complaining about the "back scratching" and "back door deals" that are happening in our government then go ahead make Congress make an Average Salary.  The amount of corruption will go through the roof because then corporations will just give them even bigger "Campaign Contributions" and they still make the same amount of money and still put through the same legislation.  So nothing will have changed you stupid idiots!  I'm sorry but unless your in the armed forces your job is not as important as the members of congress so they should make more money than you so shut up about it.  However on the same note if you are a member of the armed forces you should be pissed because you should be making more money than them or at least close to the same amount, but the rest of you should remember that as much as you think this country sucks we still have it pretty good here, and if any of you disagree with me then thats fine you have the right to that opinion because you do live here but you also have the right to move the hell out of this country and see how your "free-thinking" and all that other self help hippie generation bull shit works out there.  Good luck

Yes You are a Cult...

The Theater of Cabrillo is clearly a cult…  The whole damn place is insane for being there.  Does that make me insane maybe.  I don’t understand why I am the first one to notice this… or maybe I’m not and the others were silenced… haha just kidding but anyway here’s my proof.


These are the Signs of a Cult...

   1. Absolute authoritarianism without meaningful accountability.
- You know like that instead of taking a legit vote you just decide that your taking people to Boston and not where they actually wanted to go.  Oh and how can I forget making people ask for your permission before they cut their hair or change their appearance in anyway

   2. No tolerance for questions or critical inquiry.
- Before you ask yes Glaring, yelling at or belittling us when we ask you questions counts.  Also making anyone who doesn’t do what you want them to do immediately has to go to a Saturday morning work sessions (Also known as Forced Labor Camps…. aren‘t those illegal here?  Oh we were pretty much all under the age of 18 and being forced to work for no money.  Ummmmmm child labor anyone?)

   3. No meaningful financial disclosure regarding budget, expenses such as an independently audited financial statement.
- Like Changing your story every time you explain how much something costs you…

   4. Unreasonable fear about the outside world, such as impending catastrophe, evil conspiracies and persecutions.
- “OH MY GOD YOU HAVENT TURNED IN TICKET MONEY!?” “The Audience is stupid.” or my personal favorite “The outside world doesn’t exist here.  Leave it all at the door.”  "No outsiders are allowed in rehersals!"

   5.  There is no legitimate reason to leave, former followers are always wrong in leaving, negative or even evil.
- Anyone who quits or doesn’t audition for a show is frowned upon glared at and if they are a student they are looked at as beneath the others.

   6. Former members often relate the same stories of abuse and reflect a similar pattern of grievances.
- Honestly do I have to go into this one?

   7. There are records, books, news articles, or television programs that document the abuses of the group/leader.
- Your reading one right now…

   8. Followers feel they can never be "good enough".
- No matter how much you do they will never give you that pat on the back your looking for…

   9. The group/leader is always right.
- “My opinion is the only one that matters here” Seriously? Doesn’t that sound familiar?

  10. The group/leader is the exclusive means of  knowing "truth" or receiving validation, no other process of discovery is really acceptable or credible.
- You literally have zero say in what you do.  They will tell you what you are doing and if you question it you are verbally punished for it.  Or my favorite given the cross-eye stare of death.

11. They will never admit that they are a cult.
- Yes this includes chanting “We are not a cult.”

12. All of the members of the group are encouraged to not act as an individual.
- “When you fail you are failing your fellow actors!”  Everyone is meant to act the same look the same, and talk the same and groups or cliques are frowned upon.


Honestly don’t tell me you don’t see it now!  It is completely a Cult!  Can we call the cops or something.  I cant believe that no one has complained about that god forsaken soul-crushing place.  I mean don’t get me wrong we all keep going back their but I believe that this can not be held against us as we all were brain washed.  Someone needs to figure out a way to end this reign of terror that has been imposed by this insane  oppressive crazy faced cult leader that is holding our lives hostage  and for the love of all that is holey make it soon...